Weird, ineffable moments regarding God, the world, and unity. While doing things as simple as walking down the street. One of my mentors once noted that I have these experiences and it's not like, "I mediated for six months eating only a small bowl of rice a day and then this happened," but rather, "I was walking down the street going to class and looked up and there was an overwhelming experience of God and the ultimate unity of the world, and then I went on with the rest of my day." In a way, I'm struggling in my Jewish mysticism class because I am expected to be more surprised or bewildered than I am. Paradoxes don't stress me out. I'm not troubled by God being both concealed and revealed, or the nameless-which-is-reached-through-a-name, or circular ladders, or all division actually being unity. That makes more sense to me than nearly anything else. So as the teacher tries to get us to wrestle with and debate these concepts, I'm almost at a loss. Because what I think is, "Well, yes. Of course." How can one NOT see God in all of creation? How can we say that anything is NOT of God?
Hymn we sang on Sunday:
How shall we love Thee, holy, hidden Being,
If we love not the world which Thou hast made?
O give us brother love for better seeing
Thy world made flesh, and in a manger laid:
Thy kingdom come, O Lord, Thy will be done.
That's it. I'm incoherent. I love God a lot. It's easy to have know the concept of, "God is in everyone, in everything," but it's much harder to apply that to life on a day-to-day basis. I can get enormously frustrated with myself about this. Today I asked, "When am I going to put what I know into my life?!" And God said, "When you truly love me."
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